


Out of Breath

by Marimimi14



Series: Andrew and Neil Family's Adventures [20]
Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Adoption, Andrew is a good boyfriend, Angst with a Happy Ending, Childhood Trauma, Dissociation, Future Fic, Kevin is a Good Friend, Kid Fic, M/M, Panic Attacks, Parent-Child Relationship, Past Abuse, Professional Exy (All For The Game), Professional Exy Player Andrew Minyard, Professional Exy Player Kevin Day, Professional Exy Player Neil Josten, Protective Andrew Minyard, bad day, cats (mentionned), neil josten has a bad day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-03
Updated: 2020-06-03
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:29:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24515419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marimimi14/pseuds/Marimimi14
Summary: Neil wakes up feeling miles away from his house. Sometimes, his mind won't leave him alone and he doesn't know how to escape it. Luckily, Andrew can help.
Relationships: Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Series: Andrew and Neil Family's Adventures [20]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1654528
Comments: 12
Kudos: 164





	Out of Breath

Neil woke up with the feeling that his brain was made of cotton. His arms and legs were numb, but he had the feeling that even the smallest touch would be too much. He squeezed his eyes shut for a few seconds when he opened them again, he turned and noticed that Andrew was already out of bed. He looked the other way. It was already 7:00 AM. He had missed his morning run. Even if it took him all of his strength he got out of bed and made his way to the kitchen. He had to make sure the kids were ready for school.

***

Andrew had his eyes on Neil as soon as he entered the kitchen. He knew something wasn’t right as soon as Neil turned off his alarm this morning, all the while he was still seemingly asleep. Juniper smiled when Neil entered the room and said a loud good morning. She didn’t even seem to notice that he didn’t reply anything. Everest was shovelling his food in his mouth his eyes glued on his phone. Andrew made a mental note to talk to him about not using his phone while they were eating.

Andrew watched as Neil poured himself a cup of coffee. His blue eyes not really seeing them. He had no idea where Neil was right now, but it wasn’t in their kitchen. Neil’s slow movements made Andrew uneasy. It brought him back to their years in college and their first few years apart when they played on rival teams. It had been a while since Neil had a bad day, a truly bad day.

When Everest got up from his seat and went to put his plate in the dishwasher his arm brushed against Neil’s. On any other day, nothing would’ve happened. They were four people in a kitchen, accidental touch was bound to happen. But today, Neil flinched hard at the touch and dropped his cup of coffee. The cup broke on the floor with the loud crash, making Sir and King exited the kitchen quickly. The noise also startled Juniper who had her wide eyes on Neil. Everest looked up at Neil with a “Sorry dad.” but Andrew noticed that his words died on his lips and instead his brows frowned in worry.

Andrew took a few steps to Neil and stood in front of him. Neil still had his eyes on the broken cup of coffee on the floor. Slowly, he raised his hand and put it Neil’s nape. His touch had the benefit to make Neil look up at him and slowly blink.

“Go back to bed. I’ll be there in a few minutes.” Andrew told him in Russian.

Having two languages the children didn’t speak was useful at times like this. Even if German wouldn’t be secret for much longer since Nicky was trying to teach Juniper and Everest. Neil blinked a few more times and finally nodded slowly. He exited the kitchen with slow steps and disappeared into their room. Andrew took a deep breath, then turned to his kids.

“Is dad ok?” Juniper asked.  
“Right now, no.” Andrew answered truthfully.  
“I’m sorry.” Everest said quickly.  
“It’s not your fault Everest. Neil is having a bad day.” Andrew explained.

Everest nodded at that. They all knew sometimes Everest was the one with bad days. When the memories and nightmares of Line were still too present.

“Can we do anything to help?” Juniper asked.  
“Not really. These days need to pass.” Andrew said.  
“Is it ok if we go to school?” She asked.  
“Yes. Neil wouldn’t want you to miss school because of this.”

Andrew paused for a few seconds. Neil wouldn’t want them to see him like that either. No, the kids going to school was the best option. But what about after school? Andrew knew it would be a long day and it would take a lot out of the both of them. It wasn’t fair for the kids. Aaron was living too far away from them to help this time. It was short notice. Kevin was the only one of the Foxes (and also one of the only people around Andrew would trust with his kids) that could help.

“It would probably be best if you went to Kevin’s after school.” Andrew finally said. “I won’t have time to cook diner probably and it isn’t fair for you guys.”  
“Of course, don’t worry about us. I’ll have my phone on me. Just call when everything’s alright.” Everest said.

Juniper nodded. She got up from her chair and went to Andrew.

“Pop, can I hug you?” She asked him.  
“Yes.” Andrew said.  
She wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him. “Take care of dad ok.” She said as she let go.

Andrew ruffled her hair with a hint of a smile on his lips. He had been taking care of Neil since before they were even friends. Not that Juniper had to know how they met. They hadn’t asked yet and he was sure Neil would delight in telling the story (about the racquet to the stomach, not the trip to Columbia).

“I’ll see you later tonight. And I’ll call Kevin.” Andrew told them as they were out the door to take the bus.

Once the front door was closed, Andrew picked up his phone and called Kevin.

“Andrew.” A gruff voice greeted him. “Are you on your way. If you’re not, you’ll be late to practice.” Kevin said.

Andrew rolled his eyes. Neil was the only person allowed to remind him that they’ll be late if he didn’t hurry.

“Tell coach we won’t be there today.” Andrew said without acknowledging Kevin’s previous statement.  
“Wait, why?” Kevin asked.  
“Also, the kids are going to your place after school.” Andrew added like Kevin hadn’t even talked.  
“Andrew, what is going on?” Kevin pressed.

Andrew stayed silent for a moment, debating if he should tell Kevin or not. It was tempting to just hang up.

“Neil’s having a bad day.” Andrew finally let out.

Kevin’s breath hitched on the other side of the line and he let out a soft curse. He had been a witness to both Neil’s and Andrew’s bad days over the past years. Just like Andrew and Neil had been witnesses to his. They were all doing better nowadays, but sometimes the past was too mingled with the present.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Kevin asked.  
“Find an excuse for coach and make sure to feed Everest and Juniper. If you could also make sure they do their homework that’ll be great. I’ll call you when it’s ok for you to bring them back.” Andrew said.

Kevin let out an ok and they hung up. Andrew put his phone back in his back pocket and looked around the kitchen. He quickly cleaned up the broken cup because if he let it there, there was a good chance the cats would hurt themselves. Then he went to the bedroom to check on Neil.

Neil was laying on his side on the bed, his eyes fixed on the wall. For now, his breathing was even, even if he seemed miles away from their bedroom. He didn’t move when Andrew entered the room. Which was also a giveaway. Neil had never been able to shake his habit of being hyperaware of his environment. No matter how safe he knew their house was.

Andrew kneeled on Neil’s side of the bed so he could be eye-level with him.

“Hey.” He said.

His voice made Neil react and the redhead’s eyes focused on him. He blinked slowly at Andrew for a few seconds. Then he opened and closed his mouth a few times.

“The kids.” He finally said.  
“At school. They’ll be with Kevin after.” Andrew explained.  
Neil closed his eyes again. “I’m sorry.” He whispered.  
“You don’t need to apologize. They understand.” Andrew said. “Do you want me to stay?” He asked still kneeling at Neil’s side.

Neil kept his eyes closed but he nodded. In other circumstances, Andrew would ask for a verbal answer, but right in days like these, even the smallest movement demanded a lot of effort from Neil.

“Can I touch you?” Andrew asked quietly.

Another nod from Neil. Andrew sighed and brushed his fingers through Neil’s hair a couple of times before getting back up. He took off his armbands and put them on his bedside table. He slipped under the covers next to Neil who was facing him. The striker’s eyes had opened again while Andrew was situating himself. Andrew opened his arms in an invitation. If Neil wanted him near but not touching that was also ok, but usually his junkie like the grounding touch. Neil blinked a few times and inched himself slowly closer to Andrew. He tucked his head in the crook of Andrew’s neck and Andrew wrapped his arms loosely around his waist. Neil’s shoulders lost a bit of their tension.

Andrew had no idea how long they stayed in bed like that. He had only been aware that Neil fell asleep at some point. Sometimes sleep could help, but today it wasn’t peaceful. Neil was always fidgeting in his arms and his brows were almost always frowning. Andrew kept an eye on him to make sure he was ok. Which meant he was there and ready when Neil woke up with a gasp. Neil looked around the room, probably trying to understand where he was. His breathing was erratic.

“Neil.” Andrew said.

Neil turned sharply to him. Wide blue eyes met calm hazel ones.

“Neil you’re ok.” Andrew continued when he was sure he had Neil’s attention. “You’re at the house. The kids are safe. I’m safe. You’re safe.” Andrew listed his tone even.

It seemed to calm Neil down a little. Andrew kept whispering reassuring truths to him until his breathing was back to normal. Neil let out a big sigh when the panic attack finally subsided.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Andrew asked in Neil’s ears after a moment of silence.  
“It’s nothing new. Fucking nightmares.” Neil mumbled his lips brushing Andrew’s neck as he talked.  
“Ok. Do you want to take another nap?” Andrew asked. Neil hadn’t been able to sleep well for the past few days. More sleep couldn’t do him any harm.

Neil turned his head a little and caught the sight of the alarm clock on Andrew’s bedside table.

“Everest and Juniper would be done with school very soon.” Neil said.

Andrew could hear the exhaustion in Neil’s voice. Even if he didn’t sleep, he needed a few more hours to recharge.

“I told you they’re going to Kevin’s place. We can ask him to bring them back after dinner.” Andrew assured him.  
“Is that really ok?” Neil asked.  
“Yes. Like I said I explained to them what was going on. They understand. Us needing some time alone doesn’t make us bad parents. Plus, they’re with Kevin. They’re with someone we trust.” Andrew said.  
Neil stayed silent, thinking about what Andrew had just said. “Ok. Then I’d like to stay right here a bit longer.” Neil said.

Neil nuzzled Andrew’s neck and got even closer to the blond. Andrew held him a little tighter to him. The worst had passed. They just needed a few moments to settle down from all the emotions.

“Sure,” Andrew said. He gave Neil a quick kiss to his temple. “Don’t worry I’ll text Kevin later.”

***

After a nap (this time his sleep had been peaceful) and a few more moments in Andrew’s arms, Neil felt more present than he had when he woke up this morning. He was ready to get up and maybe eat something. He hadn’t eaten anything all day. Still, in their pyjamas, Neil and Andrew went to the kitchen. Neil sat at the island while Andrew made them an omelet. After they were done eating and they cleaned up everything, Andrew called Kevin to tell him it was ok to bring the kids back.

Five minutes later they were there, Kevin had bought a house a few streets down from theirs.

“Dad!” Juniper exclaimed when she entered the kitchen with Everest and Kevin on her heels.  
“Are you feeling better?” Everest asked still a trace of worry in his eyes.  
“Yes. Thank you.” He told them with a smile that reached his eyes.

They were both satisfied with his answer and Juniper went up to him to ask for a hug. Neil nodded and scooped his daughter in his arms, giving her a tight hug.

“Jun. We still have some homework to do.” Everest told his sister when she didn’t seem like she would let go of Neil.

Neil caught Andrew raising an eyebrow at Kevin.

“I tried my best. At least, I cooked them dinner.” Kevin defended himself.

Juniper protested a little at the perspective of homework, but finally followed her brother when he told her he would help. They left the kitchen, leaving the three adults behind. 

“What did coach say at the fact that we weren’t there at practice?” Neil asked Kevin.  
“He didn’t like it at first but when I told him it was a family emergency; he lost his fight. He told me to tell you to take all the time you needed.”  
“Thanks Kevin.” Neil told him.

Kevin nodded. He knew better than to say it wasn’t a big deal.

“Yeah good to know you’re a decent babysitter,” Andrew said. “They look happy.”  
“Don’t make a habit out of it.” Kevin said.

They all knew that if they asked Kevin would say yes. It was just that sometimes feelings and emotions were hard.

“Maybe we could tell Aaron that he’s better than him. That’ll be hilarious.” Neil said with a smirk.

Andrew shook his head and muttered “idiot” under his breath. Kevin was already starting to rant about the fact that he didn’t want to be involved in Neil’s petty idea of a joke. Their reactions made Neil laughed. Definitely the day had ended up better than it had begun. Neil glanced at Andrew and he could see the tension seeping out of his body as he watched Neil laugh. Yeah, this was better.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Thank you for reading! I had a lot of emotions and wanted to do a fic that was a little sadder. But always with a happy ending because I can't do only angst hahaha! I hope you like it!


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